Category: Uncategorized

So, 2017. What do you have in store?

Been a while since I wrote anything, but I’m going to try and amend that this year with more regular updates. Not because I expect people to read them, but because the purpose of writing for me has always been a way to vent what’s inside, allow my creativity an outlet, and maybe if I’m lucky, make someone smile.

So what’s different this year? Well, I’ve decided not to buy anything. I have far too much stuff already, even after dropping several boxes of CDs and DVDs and books and assorted crap off at the charity shop. I have enough unread books, unplayed videogames and unwritten stories to keep me entertained for an entire year. I don’t need to buy those. I have clothes in pretty good nick. I don’t need to buy those. The only things I will be buying this year are those things essential to my survival.

Now, I’ve heard people say things like this a lot. Remember that scene from spaceballs?

I can survive without most of the stuff I have. I’ll still need to eat though. But I’m conscious of the amount of food that goes to waste. It’s difficult buying stuff for one person in this country. Everything seems to come in packs big enough for 2 people. I either end up eating way too much, or I eat half and the rest goes off. No more. I’m planning out the first 3 weeks of food, and when I make too much for one evening then that’s tomorrow’s lunch sorted. My plan is to reduce waste to bare minimum levels.

Of course there may be things I need to buy in order to do essential tasks (today I bought a mop and bucket because my floor is a right state), and I’ll make allowances for these, but these will be on an ad-hoc basis and will be carefully considered purchases. As an example, I could do with a spice rack for my myriad pots of herbs and spices, but they still sit fine just on the counter, so I don’t NEED a spice rack. Therefore I will not buy a spice rack. If I DO end up buying something non-consumable I will buy with the intention of not needing to replace it and I will write about it here so you can judge me.

So much for my non-consumerism pact. What else am I going to be doing? Running more. Exercising more. Yeah I do those things anyway, but I want to do them more. At the moment I look alright naked, but I want to look GOOD naked. Don’t worry, I won’t be posting pics. I also want to get back into martial arts. There’s a Wing Chun club in town, I will scope it out.

Standard goal of reading a book every two weeks as a minimum. I think more non-fiction this year, depending on what books are on my shelves, although I think the non-fiction stuff is mostly bizarre conspiracy stuff bought back when I was a weird 20 something. But my plan after reading each book is to give it away. Either to a specific person whom I know will enjoy it, or to a random stranger who I think might appreciate it. Stories like to be read, I think. If you read them and put them back on the shelf to gather dust, you’re discrediting the book. If you like it, pass it on so someone else can like it. If you hate it… well, I guess pass it on in the hope that someone else DOES like it. I will be making use of in this endeavour. You guys should check it out. Feel free to add me on too.

I also hope to play a few more computer games, possibly write about them (either here, or on a videogame specific blog site like Destructoid), and where possible, give them away when I’m done. I haven’t properly thoguht about that one yet though.

That’s pretty much it. I’m not going to set myself a bunch of lofty goals at the start of the year and then get miserable when I fail to meet them after a month. I’m going to evaluate my situation on a daily basis and see which of my goals need tweaking for the current state, or how I need tweaking in order to meet the goals.

Three hundred and sixty five days isn’t really that long, but a lot can change in that time. My goal now as ever, is to embrace that change and see what adventures lie ahead.

2017? Come at me, bro.


Last night’s dream

I dreamt I was somewhere. a building, a venue, a stadium or something. Out through the window I saw a huge owl perch on a tree stump. I looked again and there was another owl, darker than the first. Suddenly a third, running along the ground, stretching its wings out in a silent dance. The under-feathers were iridescent green and its eyes were huge as it continued its dance.

Then I was running, trying to escape the building, but every door I took, every escalator led to a dead end filled with misbehaving children. Then the children were gone – even the one who dropped his headphones on the escalator, the one I stopped to help. The bridges were lowered and the doors were sealed.

Suddenly I was no longer in the venue… I was in a wooden house. I had cooked food for someone who was late. Always late. “That’s OK,” said the hostess, “We can have noodles and salad outside.”

In the blink of an eye I was ascending in a lift up to the 5th floor, ascending to the point where my friend had jumped. I thought I could stop him, prevent it from happening, but even as I pushed the lift button I knew it was too late. And yet I still tried.

And then I was alone.

You can’t go home again

I’m about to load the last few boxes of stuff from my house into my car and leave this place. Exactly three years I’ve been here now, but  these are my last moments in this house. My new house won’t be built until July, so I’m moving back in with my father for two months, which is not going to be easy.

Before I leave though, I am hiding a note in this house. Hopefully the new owners will find it.


Onward, then, to new adventures.

Largely uncategorised.

So it’s been a long time since I actively updated this blog. There is a very good reason for this, but I won’t go into it right now. Suffice to say that my life has been rather tumultuous of late.

Some of you may have noticed that the entire blog was disabled for a long time. Again, there are reasons, but I’ve decided to put them behind me and carry on.

This blog has helped me voice things which I otherwise would not have been able to. Without the blog I found myself storing up more and more negativity without any real vent, save for the band. The band goes a LONG way towards helping, but there are limits as to which parts of me I reveal through live performance. The blog was the counterpart to the band, you see.

So where are we now? Well in the last month I have done a number of things I didn’t think I’d get the opportunity to do. I’ve entered an interpretive dance contest. I’ve read poems out to a live audience (and was greeted with cheers). I’ve taught new teachers how to program at university. I’ve changed my online dating profile to be a jaded, cynical, misanthropic rant (and actually had more interest than when I had my “genuine” profile (Mum, don’t read too much into that, none of them are people I have any interest in). And more.

But all of these great things have been offset by the dark cloud which envelops me. Usually I can cope, but right now my armour’s wearing thin. Last night was a particularly bad one.

So I should be posting more frequently now, in the hope that these inane ramblings will brighten up my mind.